Tuesday, October 18, 2011

warning: whiney wednesday woes

It's late and I'm not going to lie...I'm not in the best mood to blog. And I wouldn't be blogging right now, except that I committed to doing it every day for Down Syndrome Awareness month.

I woke up this morning to emails from Julia and Michelle Z saying Artem's grant had grown to over ten thousand dollars. I was wildly ecstatic and even posted about it, only to take it down mere moments later. (if you kept coming back here to see where my "Shout it from the Rooftops" post went, it is in cyber hell space somewhere. Unfortunately once you post something, the "feed" for it remains static, and there is no way to delete it from people's dashboards. I know, because I googled it today:/)

Anyhoo, Artem's grant grew magically over night, and just as magically disappeared. Well, not all of it, but the large chunk that had tipped him over the ten thousand mark. Michelle Z doesn't know if the donor changed his/her mind, or if there were bank issues, but as it stands that big donation is still gone. So down came my victory post, and my morning elation as well...and it just got uglier from there.

I realized late this afternoon that I haven't seen Lily's birth video for awhile. It's one of those small video tapes that goes in the camera, not a big easy-to-find one. I spent the next hour and a half frantically searching for it, because it dawned on me that I haven't seen it since her birthday last year. So after dinner tonight my son Caleb and I spent over two hours methodically going through every box, drawer, cabinet, etc. in our house in search of that tape. I'm not the kind of person that randomly sticks things in drawers~ we hold to that motto "a place for everything and everything in its place" in our house, so our options for places to search were sort of limited. But because I was so desperate, I searched in places I would never put a video tape, since I don't know where else it could be...all to no avail.

What is so depressing is that a few years ago we were traveling and left our (old) video camera and video tapes in our hotel room. When we checked out we didn't realize it was missing- until that afternoon. We called the hotel immediately, and nobody could find our camera or tapes...all the videos we had ever taken of our kids' birthday parties, births, etc. Those were some of my happiest memories, and although I have pictures, I have no videos of my kids growing up.

So now that I can't find the video of Lily's birth, which was one of the most special times in our life for many reasons...I am really not feeling in the best blogging mood! I'm praying it turns up, but I honestly don't know where else it could be...I'm having visions of it being accidentally thrown in the trash last year when my husband moved his office to the sitting room off our bedroom, and then back to the church again when the remodel was done....lots of things were sorted through and dumped, and it would have been very easy for one little tape sitting on a desk to get tossed.


I'm trying to console myself with the thought that a)it might turn up some day and b)a hundred years ago nobody had video tapes of their children's births to look back on and c)there are bigger things in life to get upset over....

I'm also trying to look on the bright side that Artem's grant has just as much potential to jump over night as it did last night, and we still have 12 days to go til the end of October to reach our ten thousand dollar goal. And the fact that with so many people praying for him right now, his family has just got to be on the near horizon...

But lack of sleep and lots of frustration just has me ready to call it a day right now. So I hope you'll just forgive this little rant and enjoy some sweet pictures of Lily ... while I go cry into my pillow:)

*side note: I didn't ask her to do it for this picture, because I happen to think her little tongue sticking out is adorable...but Lily has a new trick now. We say, "put your tongue back in your mouth, Lily" and she immediately takes her little finger and pokes her tongue all the way back inside her mouth. Pretty cool, eh?


*another fun side note: Lily looooves animals, and is now signing "cat" and "dog"....cutest thing ever to see her pinch her little fingers together across her cheek (demonstrating pulling whiskers) to sign cat!




Lily, stop pulling out your pigtails!



Who, me?!



Still cute as ever:)



Okay, admittedly I am not feeling as sad now, after looking at these adorable pictures. It's pretty hard to be down with those sweet little almond eyes grinning up at me!

Please don't forget our five dollar challenge for Artem. It's wonderful to see huge donations come in, but it's equally fabulous to see LOTS of little ones add up to a miracle for this little guy...


And if you donate to Artem, please be sure to leave a comment so that you can be entered to win one of three autographed copies of Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts...


We'll draw winners on November 1st...and please don't forget to spread the word-

Artem needs a family!!!

31 comments:

Shauna said...

(((Hugs))) Hope you find that video! Lily is so cute! Are you tired of hearing me say that yet? We'll get there with Artem...I wish that I could adopt him...he calls to me!

stephanie said...

UGH!! Praying your video turns up! I know how you feel!! When our computer got "squashed" I thought we lost all our pics and videos. We stupidly have everything on the computer, there was no back up and the Mother board we in pieces. Luckily we were able to save the pics but for a while I thought everything was gone. crappy feeling!

praying for Artem's account to get back to where it was!
Those new pics of him were so amazing! He is so beautiful!

lovemy3 said...

Hope your mood turns around and you find the video of Lily! I really can never get enough of pictures of her!

NikkiB said...

Patti...LOVE these pics of Lily!!! They are sooo precious :) URGH URGH on the lost video :(.

Lori said...

Oh I am sorry :( If it is any consolation, I am terrible at pictures and videos (I see your scrap books and think how terrible a mother I am to not have pictures organized in such a way - and I always forget my camera and have to ask people for pics) anywho - I always think that in heaven there is a movie on my life and I can watch it over and over again (FF thru the parts that are yucky and rewinding the parts I love ;)) and I will be in heaven a lot longer than I will be here on Earth - so it will be ok....love you!

Brandi said...

Hi there! Just donated to Artem :)

twotwice2 said...

I donated to Artem ... but I am a bit confused as to how much. I have two receipts from RR, both sent on the same day, both for the same amount ($10 each), but I don't remember donating twice on the same day. (I am an old lady -- forgive me.) I have also had multiple receipts from RR arrive in my email on the same day, so there is also a possibility that I donated on two different days, or that someone hit the send button twice ... I just don't know. I donated through Julia's blog. Oh, woe. :/

Rosemary

Anna Theurer said...

Oh Patti, I had been searching for your "Shouting From the Rooftops" post and now I am sad to hear that the donation disappeared. I am also sorry to hear about Lily's video tape :( Beautiful pics as always.

Jenny P. said...

So sorry to hear you lost your video tape. It may show up again one day when you least expect it :)

I donated $25 to Artem a few days ago - I'm sure you'll reach your goal soon !! :)

debi said...

Donated to Artem a few days ago. I know his mother will find him.

Stephanie said...

Donated! Hope you find your video!

Jessica Rudder said...

I just donated $25 to Artem (the email address used was jadenyu at yahoo dot com, if that makes a difference).

I was really excited at the huge jump, but, like you said, we'll get there $5 and $10 at a time. It'll just take a few more days and a few more people shouting from the rooftops.

Best,
Jessica

L.A.C.E. said...

oh how frustrating on both counts :( I hope you find Lily's video and pray that Artem gets to 10grand and he finds his Forever Family.

gretchen said...

Just want to give you a hug today.

Lisa (DanielsMommy) said...

Just had to send some more $$ in for sweet Artem!!!

Renee said...

Donated $20 to Artem. I hope he finds his mama very soon!

cathy said...

hope & pray you find those tapes....

the pictures are magnificent

xoxo
cathy

Robin said...

Donated today to Artem's account. Love your blog!

Hansina said...

Donated to Artem!

Rick and Michelle said...

My heart aches for yours in your misplaced birth footage! Shortly after I was born, my parents' home was burglarized & my dad's camera was stolen (along with all the rolls he'd taken of my birth & since my birth). Not having a camera in the months that followed, pictures of me from birth through my preschool years are few & far between, and only due to doting aunts & uncles who snapped them. As a photographer now, I completely understand your angst in wanting to find your missing video! I will pray that it miraculously reappears!

As for the fund, God knows what's going on, and He has ever detail under control! Artem will be funded at just the right time, not a minute too late!

David and Carolyn said...

Donated $ 50.00 and praying that it's a WOW WEDNESDAY :)

Rochelle said...

Ah friend so sorry about the videos, praying you find them. I would be devastated too. LOVE the pics of Lily!

Erin B said...

$9,409...so close to your goal of $10,000! Please, please, bring Artem's mommy to him soon! Prayers of peace for your tired heart Patti :)

cara said...

Oh Patti, I am SO sorry!!!!! I will pray right now that it will turn up. God can do anything. I still regret SO much that I did not video tape all my kids' births. We did J.J.'s, and that is all. I have no idea why we didn't the first two kids. We were really young, I guess. And Anna Rose and Mary, the hospital would not let us. Then Benji came SO fast at home, and I was beyond caring about it when all nine pounds, six ounces came out. My poor hubby was just trying to help. I wish SO bad we did!! SO, I can only imagine how you must be feeling knowing you have those precious memories and cannot find them. I will keep praying for that!! I know how much that means to you. I am sorry about Artem too. I know it will get there again. I am also praying and praying a family steps up real soon. He needs rescued!! SO thankful you do not give up on being a voice for these that have no voice of their own. Much, much love to you today. Give Lily lots of kisses for us. She just keeps meltiing us all. My kids have to look at her daily. They get SO excited if they hear her on video or see her pictures. Mary could watch her on video forever. So sweet!

Susanna said...

Patti, I finally took the time to donate for Artem! And please give an extra squeeze to sweet Lily for me!

Shauna said...

hmm I have to leave a second comment today because I am noticing Artem's fund growing and growing through the day...encouraging yes? God's got this one!

Jae Marie said...

I donated a few days ago to Artem, it wasn't much. A little more than the amount requested (some change to round his total at the time out)

That total is slowly creeping up! I have no doubts that the goal will be met by the deadline (with or without big donations!!)! Every little bit HAS been helping. Happy to help in the little way that I can... although it's not much at the moment.

Jae Marie (Julia B.)

Katrina said...

So sorry to hear you can't find your tape. I was devastated once when I realized I had taped over one of my children's first 3 months of life. I don't get attached to a lot of worldly things but pictures and videos are things that are priceless to me.

Praying Artem finds a family soon since it is such a long process once they finally do have a family commit.

Katrina
Carlene's soon to be momma :)
www.operationorphannomore.blogspot.com

Annette said...

Beautiful pics of a perfect lady! Donated to Artem. Praying his momma and daddy show up soon.

teal915 said...

Sorry about your video. That is rough. Months and months after Austin was born, I put his tape in so I could watch it, but then I forgot to take it out before the next time I recorded, and I recorde over the few minutes of his birth that we had. When Kamdyn was born, it was an emergency c-section, so I had nothing. No over night bag, camera or anything. I cried when I realized we wouldn't even get any pictures. My husband went to the gift shop and bought a disposable camera that took THE MOST horrible pictures ever. Later that night, when things settled down, I was looking in my purse and realized my camera had been in it the whole time. That really stunk. I hope it turns up. If not, I'm sure you will remember it just as good as any video tape.

Lisa said...

I donated for Artem on October 5th. Thank you for what you and Julia are doing for him - I am praying someone steps forward soon!